Seasons of Life

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate;
A time for war, and a time for peace.

~ Ecclesiastes 3:1-8.

I have been thinking about these words the last few days. As the seasons change, I already find myself longing for summer. But now is not that time- now is the time for the earth to rest. I tend to be one who always looks on the bright side and has a hard time staying in the darkness. But the darkness, even though it is hard to endure, makes the light even more precious and beautiful. I still wish it was summer though!

As we as Christians start to prepare for the birth of Jesus the Messiah, I am beginning to plan for Lent, the time when we prepare for Jesus death. A time to be born, a time to die. And as my community mourns the tragic loss of young life, I weep and wait for the laughter to come. In the bible it also says, "weeping may spend the night, but joy comes in the morning." (I think it's in Isaiah, or Psalms)

It's getting dark outside my window as I type this (it's 4:13 pm). I hate when it gets dark early! But there is a beautiful pink sky, and there are kids playing in the grass outside my window. In the darkness and in the cold, beauty is still found. In our grief, we can still find joy. Our tears can lead to laughter. And, because of the birth, death, and resurrection of Jesus, there is life again after death.

I pray that you seek whatever it is you have lost. I pray that you plant and nourish seeds of faith and that you reap the benefits of spiritual fruit. I pray that your tears of mourning turn into tears of joy. I pray that we all have challenges, but also the strength and the support to endure them. I pray for a time of peace.

Unexpected Joy

Yesterday was a very busy day. Of course there was church in the morning, but before church the fire alarm went off in my building, so that added an extra splash of excitement. We had communion during the service which I always enjoy because 1) I love receiving communion and 2) I love giving communion! I am always so amazed as I look at each of you and say "The Body of Christ, given for you"- I think about God looking at each of you and how much God loves you and how important each and every one of us is to God, and I'm amazed!

High School class inbetween services was fun- we learned about Esther (check out the book in the Old Testament- it's pretty short) by watching VeggieTales and talking about courage. Lots of goofiness and chatter abounded as usual.

As I wrote in my last blog, there are lots of heavy things going on with many people here at Grace. I felt that heaviness again on Sunday, but was again amazed to see how the people of Grace care for each other in these times.

In the afternoon I had my 9th Grade confirmation students, who always keep me on my toes! So many questions, so much energy, and lots of pushing boundaries. There are some really great thinkers in that group.

Then I ran from that to the Seder Dinner with the First Communion students and their families. Wow! That was a really cool experience. The Seder Dinner is also known as the Passover Meal- the same meal that Jesus shared with his disciples on the night before his death, the basis for communion. This is quite a production and all the families pitched in to make it a success.

I was expecting to be exhausted at the end of the day, but instead when I got into my car to go home after a 12 hour day, I was filled with joy. The kind of joy that I know has to come from God because it's not anything I can ever feel of my own accord. It bubbled up unexpectedly and I was giddy all night. Yeah, I did go to bed early, but with a smile on my face and so much thanks in my heart for the God who gave me this joy, who gives us the blessings of his body and blood, and awesome people of all ages in this congregation who love God and want to learn and grow in their faith.

When are times you have felt that unexpected joy? Have you ever felt that God is with you? What did that feel like? What were you doing?

Hard Times

I've been trying to decide all day what to write about. I've been looking through some of my favorite books for inspiration. I didn't find anything that struck me today. But here's what's on my mind...

I'm thinking about the people at Grace. There are so many wonderful people here. I've gotten to know some of you, but I am still learning names. Sunday mornings fly by with so much going on, there's never enough time to talk. I hope you know you are always welcome to make an appointment to come and talk with me. And I'm happy to meet you somewhere too- for a walk or coffee or a trip to the dog park! People (aka YOU) are the reason I wanted to be a pastor in the first place- because I love sharing the love of God with you. It is such a joy and a privilege to be able to do that finally- after all those years of seminary! :)

One of the hard parts about loving people is that when they hurt, you hurt. There are a lot of people at Grace right now going through some heart-breaking hurts. I don't know why these things happen. There are certainly no easy answers.

But one thing I really do believe is that God takes all the bad things that happen in our lives and somehow makes something good out of them. I don't think I believe that God causes these things to happen, but I do think that whatever good comes out of them comes from God. It can be so hard to see God working in the midst of our tragedies, but if God is who he says he is, God will be there- shining a light in the darkness, making the crooked paths straight, and bringing life out of death.

The Bible can be a great companion- reading the Psalms is a great help to me when I'm angry and sad. They contain some wrenching, honest cries to God as well as praises. (Psalms 22, 46 and 61 are good examples). I leave you with some words from Romans 8, and a prayer for God's presence in your times of joy and pain.

"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words. And God, who searches the heart, knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saint according to the will of God. We know that all things work together for good, for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose..."

Friday Five: FOOD!

hello again folks...

i stumbled on a blog this past summer that is for women clergy. it's pretty interesting and has been helpful as i've been in this new job. they have online discussions about texts and other things that come up in this line of work. one thing they do is post the "friday five"- questions on a different topic every week. so, without further ado...here they are, along with my answers!

If you were a food, what would you be?
I think I would be coffee. I know that's not really a food, but to some of us it is! Like coffee, I can adapt to different situations. I can be perky or perk-less. mmmm....i think i need to go find a caffeinated cup of myself right now!

What is one of the most memorable meals you ever had? And where?
Probably the dinner at my sister's wedding. It was at an Italian chophouse and it was a HUGE meal. Plus it was a wonderful occassion to celebrate!

What is your favorite comfort food from childhood?
Tuna-and-Noodle Cassarole! I didn't like any of the ingredients individually (tuna, onions, green pepper, mayo, mustard...ick) but together- mmm boy!

When going to a church potluck, what one recipe from your kitchen is sure to be a hit?
I can make this really yummy artichoke/cheesy spread for bread or crackers. I made it for a party once and this guy stood by it the whole night eating it. This post is making me really hungry...

What’s the strangest thing you ever willingly ate?
Well my brother used to be a chef in fancy restaurants so I've eaten lots of crazy things! I think it would be better to say one thing I did NOT willingly eat was lutefisk. ...

First Entry!!!

Hello! Welcome to Pastor Heidi's blog! I hope this will be a good way to create new thoughts and discussion about God, faith, life, coffee...wherever the spirit leads. If you register for an account with blogger.com you can respond to my entries. I have done this for other blogs and it's pretty simple to do. It doesn't mean you need to blog yourself- so don't worry if you don't blog.

That all being said, I'll get down to what I really wanted to say. When I was in college, I received a scholarship from the Fund for Theological Education. Part of receiving this scholarship was a requirement that we attend a conference in the summer. I was not too excited about this because I didn't know anyone else who would be going to the conference. (Now this was ironic because when I received the scholarship I was studying abroad and was travelling around Europe by myself. Funny.) But I went and it turned out to be a life-changing experience. It was at this conference that I really began to embrace the vocation I felt drawn to- ministry.

At the conference I lent a book to someone who promised to return it. Yeah, right. Well, oddly enough, that book found it's way back into my hands last week. 6 years later! It was such a nice surprise, like bumping into an old friend. This book had been with me as I traveled Europe and was a great source of comfort when I often felt so alone. I am starting to re-read it, and I came across a passage that was particularly dear to me...

You are at my side, dear friends, and God is everywhere. Yet ultimately we are alone, making our way home by the candle of the heart. The light is steady and sure but extends only far enough to see the next step. That there are steps beyond is a matter of faith. That we have the faith to endure and walk our own journey- even when we think we are lost- is a gift of grace, and of friendship. Many times our light seems to go out. But another light, one held by a stranger or a friend, a book or a song, a blackbird or a wildflower, comes close enough so that we can see our path by its light. And in time we realize that the light we have borrowed was always also our own. ~ A Woman's Journey to God, Joan Borysenko.

I do believe that God is everywhere. The Psalmist wrote "Where can I go from your spirit? Or where can I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there; if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there. If I take the wings of the morning and settle at the farthest limits of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me fast." (139)

God was with me as I traveled. God was with me at the conference. God was with me in Chicago during seminary, and God is with me here. It can be terribly hard to see God when we get tired and our light fades. But I pray that we remember to look around for what will sustain us in those times- a friend, a book, a bible verse, our church family, or a connection with nature or a pet- because God will show up, often in surprising places. Where do you find God? Have you ever been surpised?

It is so true that we can't see further than a few steps ahead in our journey through life. Something terrible or wonderful may be around the corner. But know that God is with you through it all and that you are not alone. I hope this blog will be a source of light for you as you walk the road of life and of faith. As my favorite writer, Anne Lamott says, "Traveling Mercies: love the journey, God is with you, come home safe and sound."