Last week on my day off, I decided to go to Panera for lunch. It was one of those foggy, gray days we've been having lately. I was lounging on my couch, but I managed to drag myself off of it and make myself presentable to the public. I had slept in, I was kind of groggy- to match the weather- and it took me a while to get going.
When I finally made it to Panera, it was late and I was hungry. I was glad to see there wasn't a very long line. I took my place and waited for my turn. The line formed to the right of the cash register, and soon a couple came in from the left. They moved as if they were about to stride right up to the counter and order, when the woman turned to me and said, “Are you waiting in line?”
“Yes” I said- relieved that she asked and didn’t cut, “I'm waiting.” She stood behind me but her husband didn't move from the counter. “I'm waiting” I said again, this time more in his direction. Still he didn't move. I thought, he must be hard of hearing. So I raised my voice, probably a little higher than I normally would...”I'M WAITING!”
He whipped around and gave me a horrible, angry look. “What are you waiting FOR?” he sneered, also a bit too loudly. Whoa.
It's moments like this I want to do 2 things. Now I know that I'm short and sweet and people would not describe me as “physically intimidating.” But, I AM from Chicago after all, and I have no problem sticking up for myself when I need to. So, in times like this, I'd like to go “Chicago” on him and tell him just what I think of his rudeness. He may be from Mequon, but I’m from the South Side!
The other thing I would have liked to do is tell him he was just mean to a pastor :)
But I didn’t do either. The woman in line in front of me said I could go ahead of her because she didn’t know what she wanted yet (yeah, that’s right, I wasn't even next in line) so I stepped up and ordered, fighting back tears.
Finally, I sat down to eat my lunch, and his words kept running through my mind. “What are you waiting FOR?” After a while I calmed down and the words started to lose their edge, and I started to think, “What AM I waiting for?” An appropriate question for Advent, don't you think? Advent, the time when we are waiting and preparing for the birth of Christ.
In the church, we take 4 weeks to wait for the birth of Christ. We light candles to symbolize the light coming into our darkness. We decorate with evergreens to show the undying nature of God's promises and love. The color of the pastors stoles and the paraments, the cloths hanging off the altar, are a deep blue to symbolize the color of the sky just before the dawn.
At home, we decorate our evergreen trees as well. We wrap presents and place them underneath the tree and wait in delicious anticipation to open them. What is inside? Is it the iPod, or necklace, or toy, or video game we are hoping for? Soon those questions will be answered.
But I wait for more than just presents, don't you? I wait for a world in which there is no more pain. I wait for a world in which mourning and crying and death will be no more. I wait for an end to war. I wait for a cure for cancer and AIDS and multiple sclerosis. I wait for a time when I don't worry about people not taking me as seriously because I am a woman. I wait for an end to racism. What do you wait for?
For the past four years when I was in seminary, it seemed like all I was doing was waiting. Don't get me wrong, I had a lot of fun and I soaked up the rich experience of studying and preparing to be a pastor. But in the moments I had last July when I was ordained and called to be your pastor, the waiting was over. It was like finally- I could do what I had been waiting to do for four years, or 27 years since I was born. I have been waiting to stand here and share with you the good news of great joy that this world so desperately needs to hear.
Because outside these doors, there is a lot of pain. There is a lot of loneliness. I don't really need to remind you of that, do I? I know that we bring that pain in here with us. But in this place we experience something different- we hear of good news of great joy, but we also do more than just hear about it. We experience it. There are so many times when I know one of you has had surgery, lost a loved one, or had a rough week in some way, and I can't even make it over to talk to you because as soon as you walk in the door, you are greeted and hugged and comforted. I hope that you all experience that when you need it. After going through a horrible week, one of you described it in this way “I came in these doors, and I knew I could let go. I didn't have to be strong anymore.” That’s part of why it’s called a “sanctuary”- it’s a place we can go to be safe, to rest, to retreat.
That’s why I am a pastor, why I chose to stand here in this pulpit instead of anywhere else. Because there is a lot of pain in this world, but here is where I find my comfort and my joy. Here is where I find my hope and strength.
I find these things in a baby born in a world that had no room for him. I hear good news of great joy proclaimed to a bunch of dirty, sleepy, smelly guys hanging out with sheep. And when I hear this good news of great joy, I am filled with that joy. I am inspired, full of hope and I know what God wants- that this broken world to be healed by his love. God wanted that so much that God was born into this world to show us that love. Tonight we celebrate that good news first told to the shepherds.
But the shepherds didn’t realize what was happening at first. They were scared. “Do not be afraid” the angel said. “LOOK!” she continues. She has to tell them to look- because the first thing we want to do when we feel afraid is to run away and hide. Fear locks us up in a small room, like a jail cell. There is no fresh air, and no light. We can't see things for what they are, since we have curled up, we can't move. When we're in the darkness of fear, everything seems to stop.
But the shepherds do not need to fear because this time, there is light. This time, God is bringing good news of great joy. There is no more judgment. There is no more waiting for the savior God promised to send. No more hiding from God's glory in a cliff like Moses did. No more only seeing God’s “backside.” God is here in the flesh, God is here to save us. God came to save everyone of us, right down to those guys out in the field with their sheep. I mean, everyone. That means me, that means you, that lady sitting next to you, and yes- even the mean guy in line at panera!
In fact, the angel says “You” or implies it 6 times in her short speech. YOU- do not fear. I am bringing YOU good news of great joy. To YOU is born a savior...God came for US because God couldn’t wait any longer.
And when the shepherds finally heard the good news of great joy of Jesus' birth, they couldn't wait. Not one second. They had to go, RIGHT AWAY, to see this with their own eyes. They said, “Let us go NOW to Bethlehem to see this thing that has taken place, which the Lord has made known to US.”
The shepherds are the first to hear and the first to see GOD is HERE! Jesus is born and the promises we heard about in the reading from Isaiah are fulfilled. Our burdens are lightened. The things that oppress us, that weigh us down no longer have control over us. They exist, but not forever. There is still darkness, but there is also light. There is still bad news each night, but there is also good news of great joy. Because a child has been born, a savior, god in the flesh. When the cry of the baby Jesus pierced through the air, the sky was ripped apart to make room for angels singing, the glory of the Lord, and peace to all whom God loves.
This is the beginning of the good news of great joy. This baby is the one we have been waiting for- the one who gave sight to the blind, healed the sick, and proclaimed that those who mourn will be comforted, the poor are rich, and that in death there is LIFE. He is the way, the truth and the life.
In this world of technology it can be easier to stay connected with each other, but an e-mail or a letter can never replace being in the presence of one that you love. There is nothing in the world like being hugged by my mom, knowing that those arms held me as a baby and still reach out to me with unconditional love today.
At Christmas, we can remember that God loved us so much he didn't just want to send us chain letters and tablets of stone. He wanted to be one of us. He wanted to welcome the little children into his arms, to touch the eyes of the blind man to heal him, to talk with us and eat with us. He wanted to be close to us so that we could be close to him.
We wait each year to celebrate Christ’s birth, and we wait for him to come again. As we wait, we have the good news to not just hear but to live. We have neighbors to be Christ’s hands reaching out to us. We have the water of baptism to refresh us, we have the bread and wine to feed us. We have good news of great joy to bring us peace. We have OUR shepherd, Jesus, to lead us. And as Mary treasured these words and pondered them in her heart, so do we. Amen.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Rejoicing
What makes you rejoice about:
1) Waiting: Sometimes the waiting can be more fun than the actual experience. As one who tends to build things up in her head, waiting and dreaming can be the best part. I like to dream of taking trips, but when it comes down to it, sometime I'd rather just stay at home. Traveling can be stressful. Also, I love to wait because anticipation is so exciting! My family opened presents on Christmas Eve, and the excitement of that day was incredible!
2) Darkness: To me, darkness is a time people return home from a long day to be alone or be with their families. It's a time of coziness, of safety, and hopefully rest. It's a time to re-create ourselves and to look back on our day with thanks.
3) Winter: A fresh snow is always gorgeous, as long as the roads are safe or I have no where to go. On a warmer day like today, I love to take a deep breath- I love the small of fresh air mixed with snow. And sometimes I'm able to rejoice that the earth is resting, holding seeds and bulbs deep in the soil so that they can bloom when all the snow melts. The earth needs a sabbath too!
4) Advent: Christmas lights, Advent wreaths, in general all the decorations that make this time of the year special. Remembering again the birth of Christ and thinking about how I can personally prepare myself and the world for this gift.
5) Jesus coming: um, I could write a book for this section! Listen to my sermons for the answers!
What about these things makes you rejoice?
1) Waiting: Sometimes the waiting can be more fun than the actual experience. As one who tends to build things up in her head, waiting and dreaming can be the best part. I like to dream of taking trips, but when it comes down to it, sometime I'd rather just stay at home. Traveling can be stressful. Also, I love to wait because anticipation is so exciting! My family opened presents on Christmas Eve, and the excitement of that day was incredible!
2) Darkness: To me, darkness is a time people return home from a long day to be alone or be with their families. It's a time of coziness, of safety, and hopefully rest. It's a time to re-create ourselves and to look back on our day with thanks.
3) Winter: A fresh snow is always gorgeous, as long as the roads are safe or I have no where to go. On a warmer day like today, I love to take a deep breath- I love the small of fresh air mixed with snow. And sometimes I'm able to rejoice that the earth is resting, holding seeds and bulbs deep in the soil so that they can bloom when all the snow melts. The earth needs a sabbath too!
4) Advent: Christmas lights, Advent wreaths, in general all the decorations that make this time of the year special. Remembering again the birth of Christ and thinking about how I can personally prepare myself and the world for this gift.
5) Jesus coming: um, I could write a book for this section! Listen to my sermons for the answers!
What about these things makes you rejoice?
Thursday, December 6, 2007
God's Presence
In Whom We Live and Move and Have Our Being
Denise Levertov
Birds afloat in air's current,
sacred breath? No, not breath of God,
it seems, but God
the air enveloping the whole globe of being.
It's we who breathe, in, out, in the sacred,
Leaves astir, our wings
rising, ruffled- but only the saints
take flight. We cower
in cliff-crevice or edge out gingerly
on branches close to the nest. The wind
marks the passage of holy ones riding
the ocean of air. Slowly their wake
reaches us, rocks us.
But storm or still,
Numb or poised in attention,
we inhale, exhale, inhale,
encompassed, encompassed.
This is one of my favorite poems. I first read it in a book a friend put together for me before I studied abroad for a semester in college. I guess I like it because I have always been fascinated by the wind- how you can feel it and hear it (or at least the sound it causes whatever it blows by to make) but you can't see it.
This poem was a comfort to me when I was living in another country and nothing was familiar. Remembering that God was with me, as close as the air I breathe, was so helpful. Being "encompassed" by God with each breath, letting the Spirit (also translated as "breath" in Hebrew) come into our bodies...thinking of our relationship with God in this way puts things in a new light. Rather than God being someone we call out to from another place, God is a presence as near to us as air. God is here whether we recognize it or not, supporting us, filling us, and moving us in ways we can't see but we can feel.
What is the Spirit doing in your life these days? Is it a light breeze, a strong gust, warm, cold...how is God present for you?
Denise Levertov
Birds afloat in air's current,
sacred breath? No, not breath of God,
it seems, but God
the air enveloping the whole globe of being.
It's we who breathe, in, out, in the sacred,
Leaves astir, our wings
rising, ruffled- but only the saints
take flight. We cower
in cliff-crevice or edge out gingerly
on branches close to the nest. The wind
marks the passage of holy ones riding
the ocean of air. Slowly their wake
reaches us, rocks us.
But storm or still,
Numb or poised in attention,
we inhale, exhale, inhale,
encompassed, encompassed.
This is one of my favorite poems. I first read it in a book a friend put together for me before I studied abroad for a semester in college. I guess I like it because I have always been fascinated by the wind- how you can feel it and hear it (or at least the sound it causes whatever it blows by to make) but you can't see it.
This poem was a comfort to me when I was living in another country and nothing was familiar. Remembering that God was with me, as close as the air I breathe, was so helpful. Being "encompassed" by God with each breath, letting the Spirit (also translated as "breath" in Hebrew) come into our bodies...thinking of our relationship with God in this way puts things in a new light. Rather than God being someone we call out to from another place, God is a presence as near to us as air. God is here whether we recognize it or not, supporting us, filling us, and moving us in ways we can't see but we can feel.
What is the Spirit doing in your life these days? Is it a light breeze, a strong gust, warm, cold...how is God present for you?
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